Category Archives: Fake Breaking News

Breaking News: ChocoBandido’s Choco Heist

Could "Loca" be reason for daring choco heist?
ChocoBandido and Loca, his chick in happier times.  ChocoBandido is considered dangerous.  Authorities urge the public to call police if they see this dangerous rodent.  ChocoBandido has a unique tattoo on his chest that reads “Mi Vida Loca” a tribute to his undying love for Loca.

Early reports of the daring heist caught on Chococam #41 shocked ChocoWorld. What appeared to be a rough looking character wearing what has been described as kangamouse get up as he stole ChocoNuggets from the Queen’s Valentine’s Day pre-party preparations.

ChocoBandido posted this picture of him and Loca to Facebook just hours before he dangled and wrangled ChocoNuggets into his ChocoBandido suit (we are

still not sure where he stashed as he dashed.  Kangaroo theories abound). We now know he has a heart for what he describes as “Mi Vida” or “My Life”. His “Vida” is Loca. From the tattoo on the chick next to him in his post, we are pretty sure Loca is blond.

No sign of Loca yet but the night is still young.  Detectives are working on a lead but aren’t saying much.  A source close to the case spoke to our reporter.  She has heard whispers of Mr. Fluffles having a paw in it.  Oh what a tangled web indeed.

Scenes from earlier today.  It’s rumored that ChocoBandido was stunt double for Tom Cruise in several films, explaining why he appeared to be flying on security camera footage.

Daring Choco Heist
Daring Choco Heist

aflufflesandmouse

Investigators worked with sketch artist and eye witness to recreate what the witness witnessed.  The hope is that someone will recognize ChocoBandido and notify the authorities.

 

Routine Maintenance

Routine Maintenance

I’m still new to the blogging world– even newer to all of these photo editing tools. Imagine my surprise when I came across this witchery.  First, I am so mad that none of my so called friends never told me about this.  Here I was thinking they had just aged well.  I never see them in real life.

I apologize for the inconvenience but 4utu will be down for some routine maintenance– you know, IP address, virus protection, spam cleaner maintenance.  Real serious stuff.  Photoshopping, responsible photoshopping is routine maintenance right?

Where was this eyebrow magic when I needed it.  Some advice from someone who knows…don’t ever use a razor for fine work around the eyebrows no matter how hard pressed you are for time.  It’s not worth it.  I expanded the space between my caterpillars so wide a tonka truck could have made a uturn there.

I may never be able to go out in the light of day again. It will be too much trouble trying to explain the discrepancy between virtual me and unedited me.

Bar light never sounded so good…

–Breaking News– The one that got away has taken Wonderland Flats

More breaking news as it breaks!

4utu

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This unidentified peeps escaped a maximum security prison and has taken hostages.  He just tweeted this picture confirming they never should have let him watch Hunger Games.  Hindsight is 20/20.

He is surrounded but still refuses to give back Wonderland Flats or his hostages. More news as it breaks.  He doesn’t have hands so we are not sure how he took this selfie.Image

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Lupus & Me: My heart

Month 3 milestone for 4utu! Hooray:) I never expected to meet such wonderful people from all around the globe. I’m inspired!
Gracias from Estela— me 🙂

Fluffles aka the Candy Cane Licker from Fake Breaking News sends his thanks to all the followers who have mailed him treats while he remains in custody of the queen for crimes against Christmas trees and houseplants.

4utu

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At present, 1.5 million people in the United States alone have systemic lupus.  A majority, 90%, are women.  And while there are many theories about the next fact, no one really knows for sure– Latinas, Native American, Asian American and African American women will see greater numbers of lupus in their families.   There is a higher incidence rate of lupus among minority groups.

Those are the facts.  While there isn’t much that can be done on avoiding the disease all together– there aren’t any cures or even ways to prevent lupus, there are ways to manage the disease.

I was diagnosed with lupus following major internal organ involvement many years ago.  I’ve probably been living with the symptoms most of my life even before the diagnosis.  That’s common in lupus–  many people get ill and experience different symptoms ranging from fatigue, arthritis and joint pain to unexplained hair loss…

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–Breaking News– The one that got away has taken Wonderland Flats

Image

This unidentified peeps escaped a maximum security prison and has taken hostages.  He just tweeted this picture confirming they never should have let him watch Hunger Games.  Hindsight is 20/20.

He is surrounded but still refuses to give back Wonderland Flats or his hostages. More news as it breaks.  He doesn’t have hands so we are not sure how he took this selfie.Image

–Breaking News–Evidence is mounting against Fluffles

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Evidence is mounting against Fluffles aka The Candy Cane Licker.  His rap sheet is growing longer by the minute.

It had long been suspected that he had something to do with the Queen’s plant turning yellow.  A 5 month long investigation revealed that Fluffles’ owner knew of his misdeeds and was part of the cover up.  Can anyone really own a criminal mastermind like Fluffles?  We asked the same question.  The owner said yes– he has the papers to prove it.  The owner refuses to accept the evidence as legit.  He wants to know why all these pictures just started surfacing now– after 4utu has publicly announced it was refining Photoshop skills.

4utu has reached out to the cast of Bones and CSI for crime scene forensic support.  No word from either yet.

Stay tuned.  We’ll break more news as it’s cracked.

–Breaking News–Candy Cane Licker Captured

--Breaking News--Candy Cane Licker Captured

You read it here first– the Candy Cane Licker was captured by the Royal Service tonight. We now know his real name is Fluffles.

This picture, taken by our reporters, was a key piece of evidence in the case against Fluffles. It’s undeniable and put to rest accusations that 4utu was making the whole thing up.

The case and restraining order against 4utu by the coalition of neighborhood cats has been dropped. For more on the story read “Never Say Never.”

Wake

Painting by Vanessa Caballero
Painting by Vanessa Caballero

The world is falling apart

I thought you got the email

I posted it on Twitter

Many reblogged

The world is falling apart

Didn’t you read the news

There’s already a meme

Some parrot

It’s kind of funny

The world is falling apart

It isn’t anything new

Here’s my call to action

Find something to change

It starts with you

A beautiful song

Claimed it’s but a dream

If you believe it

Choose not to sleep

Reflect on the dream

Once you awake

But while you’re in it

Give, don’t just take

If this is slumber

And life is not

Ride the wave

Don’t be complacent

Ride high

Fear not